Friday, October 30, 2009

Hollow's night.

"Its always been just you and me, you know." She smiled and looked at me from under her lashes, blinking twice and my eyes curved at their edges, smiling for me. The cool breeze passed by patiently, not in a rush of any sort and we sat there at the edge of the lake watching each tiny ripple soothe on by. Her fingers played with the sand and she gathered portions, allowing them to slip through her fingers, I mimicked her.

"Did you have a good Halloween," she asked without looking at me, her eyes flickered back and forth from the water to the sand. I pressed my lips together and replayed the night over in my head, cringing at some places-internally smiling at others.
"It's tough to say," I admitted, which was the truth in every sense. It was hard to decide whether the bad moments out did the good or if the good ones out did the bad. It was a mix of the two.

"Yeah.." She trailed off as her hands reached into the small pocket of her black cardigan, with them she pulled out a tiny caramel candy.
"You want it?" Her eyes were questioning and I shook my head reassuring her that it was hers, she could have it.
She unwrapped it carefully, sticking the empty wrapping back into her pocket and curving her lips around the caramel, I watched and the faint smell from the candy reached me.

She chewed carefully, tasting every bit of the smooth caramel and her eyes widened, suddenly surprised, "I have something for you!" She said once again reaching into her pocket. I waited, a bit confused, she got me something for Halloween? Really? I felt a ping of guilt for I didn't get her anything.
"Here," she handed me a tiny smooth square, its edges were hard-rimmed with a dark green coating and the picture on the square was of a deep, dark lake, and the sky was painted deep blue, resembling a magical night with tiny white and yellow stars.

"I don't know what you can use it for but it reminded me of our lake, I had to grab it for you." She waited for my response, lips parted into a smile.

I sat quietly, taking in the small-hard-smooth square. I turned it in my hands and it felt cold but soothing.

"It's beautiful," I whispered, looking over at her. That's when my body took a chance, leaning forward just a tad-slowly progressing closer to her, when her eyes turned from excitement into confusion. I stalled. Realization of my current action kicked in and I forced my body back into place with the gift still in my hands.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009


A silent thunder shattered the night sky, making it appear like broken glass as linear cracks separated the shock of light from the clear night.

It was a destructive, yet, silent beauty, the way the sky lit up in sections and how the rest of the vast night was serene- untouched.

Saturday, October 24, 2009


Night and day were of equal lengths, stretching long and far- mirroring each other.
The simplicity of it all was the result of one day, how one day made a change- joined two differences and created one alluring unity.

Within that unity I could feel the intimacy-the acceptance to collide and represent time together. Not fighting over who shall shine or darken- the willingness was overpowering- eye opening.

My dream, and maybe it is a foolish dream, is for the world to be like the equinox; to collide in equal lengths and to create our own unity, with such a willingness that is irrevocable.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

New Moon soundtrack.

Bought the new soundtrack!
It's awesome, definitely worth the buy.


You don't see what it is that you bewitch.
A beauty so stormless and serene.
It puts the day sky to shame and invades the night, making all the stars surrender to you.
All of the wonders that you bewitch alter like the dawn of day and the twilight of night.
Blurring in and out, your imperfections so remarkable-so clear to me.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Dwelling place.

Friday, October 16, 2009


(This is not meant for anyone-just fun fiction.)

I waited, because you told me I had good reason to.
I held on, because you told me I should, we are meant to be, it's clear, you said.

I still remember every word, every expression your face played.
I was happy, light, and carefree; your words did that to me.

I know life takes it's course, it's only natural for things to change, but I wasn't expecting this.

You should stop, stop waiting, giving me so many chances. Your words now confuse me.

Stop holding on to whatever we are, whatever this is. I cringed, when you referred to our love as this.

You tricked me it seems, and I'm used to being betrayed, tricked, just not by you.
You robbed me of my innocence, played with my mind.

Fine, was all that I could say to you at the moment.

You made my hopes rise, through the sky, past the moon. You cheated me in this game of yours, or whatever this is. I see you different now, my whole perspective on you was illusive. You're quite the con.

That's what I should have told you, the words just didn't come, didn't flow as easily, and I'll be honest, they still don't.

It's not easy to admit i was taken as a fool.

But wait, it doesn't end there, not just yet.

I have something in store for you, it's a surprise.

You'll just have to wait and see.

It's obvious you didn't pay as close attention to my words as I did to yours.

Once someone messes with my head, I turn...into something that I shouldn't. I clearly remember my words, my warning to you.

I turn cold, and all the guilt leaves, all the- oh, I feel so sorry for him- thoughts vanish.
Yeah, I remember telling you that. You nodded your head, agreeing you understood.

You want to play games? (sigh) I guess you never heard that I was good at games, they're my specialty.
I hope you're ready for THIS.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

A Hollows Halloween.

A Halloween contest for all readers out there!

If you haven't read the Hollow by Jessica Verday, you're definitely missing out! Don't be left out in the cold anymore! By clicking below and signing up, you can win five sets of her haunting novel.


Monday, October 12, 2009


"Maybe one day well be free of this life, well get to do the things that we used to do, before the madness kicked in and went into overdrive." I said letting my eyes fall. He laughed and held me, the way that I love, and I smiled too.
"You have quite the ambition," he kissed my forehead and rested his chin on the top of my head. I was quiet then, enjoying the security and the familiar-recently lost-serene moment. I wanted to just stay here, maybe not forever, but until this chaotic time was over.

We could wait here, let time pass, we would be okay-safe here.

"Ambition is putting it lightly," I admitted, and lifted my head and looked at him, his eyes were calm and I could tell that within them there was meaning; a meaning that I would figure out one day, allow myself to become vulnerable and personal with.

"Ambition is for the reckless," he said and that made me grin.

"Seems to suit me," I playfully said and shurgged, my eyes fell to his chest and I leaned closer.

He laughed and tangled his hands in my hair. We stood there entwined in each others arms, waiting for the time to come when it would be me and him again in my room, talking for hours about everything but this suffocating, endless time .

Sunday, October 11, 2009


&& well do this together, the way it's meant to be.
It's just you and me God.


Pain for him.

I sulked in the pain, licking my lips at its taste. It drove me wild, seriously insane.
I felt alive, my fingers jammed against the table, then came the hair gripping.
Ripping, tearing pain pulsated through my skin and I breathed hard, curling my toes in delight.

If only this pain would never ease, but throb on end.

Then, it would create the blackout I thirst for.
I could remain oblivious to my life, and live only in pain.

To concentrate on this feeling alone is easy, pain is easy.
Dealing with my life? That's hard.

"Bring on the pain."

Friday, October 9, 2009


Today was an especially funny day. I love my best friend and her cousin, really, they are genuinely great people. I wish I can come up with a less cliche word for great, but I have a huge headache. I'm super excited that it's fall!!!! Probably one of my favorite times of the year, including Christmas. I wish that Miami was just as pretty in the fall as it is in Springfield. It's gorgeous over there this time of the year. Well, I wrote this post not to talk about the fall and what not, but to promote Jessica Verday! An insightful YA paranormal romance author,who I do look up to. She has a Q&A on her blog, every author wants the attention and for their readers to hear them out.

So go read her interview! It's entertaining and interesting! I promise!

I cannot wait for Abbey's necklace design and perfumes to come out!
Also, if you have yet to read THE HOLLOW, what are you doing? GO READ IT, NOW!

Thursday, October 8, 2009


These little pages bounded together made me a very happy child.

Till then

When my time comes, I will go without a fight in me, but my time has yet to come. I belong here with her, and there's still our life to complete, people to love, and certain occurrences to end. Till then, I'm here. - Dean Koontz

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Right there.

I didn't even know you were there, all along by my side.
I didn't even feel you around, notice your existence.

Oh, but yes, you were there.
All along right there.

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Numbness for the living.

Till this day I think of everything. Everything that has ever happened, images constantly play in my head, pieces of different Polaroids flash in and out. The most unfair part? The part that sucks the most? Is the memories that I want to keep, want to hold on to, fade quickly, never stay long, barely come.

But the other images, the other memories that I would give anything to ban, to just simply send to hell, always come, always stick, and make themselves a part of me.

Then there's the numbness.

The state of total ease. Where I feel nothing, remember nothing, know nothing. The only thing that I am sure of is that I'm still alive, still capable to live, and in this state, when all is at peace within me, I see a glimpse-a moment of clarity- that I can change, run my life. Get through this, and get out.

With him.


Saturday, October 3, 2009


"Sometimes, no, all of the time, life is... hard. We fall. We don't get up. We stay put, stuck."